The
sultry, soaked sod squelches soundly b’low
My
feet. Barefoot, I tread unwillingly.
Blood-red
berries glow in the frosted air.
Birds
chirp to the beat of my icy breath.
They
spread their wings, their songs of the lost ones
Who
once ruled the land I travel across.
Known
for their fearlessness, they conquered all
That
stood before their intrepid weapons.
But
nonetheless, they carried themselves here
And
became one with Gaia, Mother Earth.
They
watch through the trees, black eyes and pale skin.
Birds
dwell on them and leaves become from them.
But
none today. No leaves shine through the
frost.
All
birds suddenly vanish with the wisps.
They
tangle around my ankles, my hands,
My
fingers, intertwined, with ancestral
Hope
rushing through me. I force my eyes
shut.
The
voices, the chanting grows infinite
In
volume. Long hair and thick spears, blued lips.
Fleeting
images wrap me, too tightly.
My
eyes, shut harder. My face drawn with
pain.
My
mind, broken point of calamity.
Until
silence. Silence doth come to me.
Eyes
look up and trees look incessantly
To
me, waiting for my demise? My leave?
I
walk on, the ground frosting with ev’ry step.
Blood
flowing from my feet, purple hands and
Black
fingers circle each other, gath’ring
Warmth
of the invisible, unknown fire.
The
ground rushes up to me, slicing my
Skin,
freezing my life, devouring my soul.
Souls
of the forgotten hath not forgot.
I love the picture you paint with this poem. It's very vivid. I especially like the auditory imagery you use. In addition, I really like the use of enjambment. It helps make the poem flow. The use of alliteration in the first line sounds a little forced. I'm not so sure about the word soundly, but I really like the word squelches. It gives the auditory imagery I mentioned earlier.
ReplyDeleteOverall, I think the poem gives the reader a very clear picture of what it is like to walk in the woods and hear one's ancestors. The last three lines are my favorite. The final line gives that nice "ker chunk" that we looked for in class.